Monday, September 12, 2011


So... I don't think I am ever going to have children.

I've always thought I would, and I like kids, but it occurred to me today, as I sobbed hysterically for the first ten minutes of my drive, that if I am this upset saying goodbye to my dogs, what would I be like with actual human children that came from my body? And then I decided, for my own sanity, that I would probably stick to bulldogs for the rest of my life. So, sorry mom and dad- those future grand kids you always talk about? Yeah... not happening.

Olivia and Griffin are on vacation this week. I am headed to New York City to see the Daily Show, the Lion King on Broadway, eat hot dogs off the corner and shop for some knock off handbags with my mom. While I am gone, the puppies are hanging out at camp with their Grandpi. When I told them about the plan, they were thrilled and they bounced around and whined and drove me insane until we got the car loaded and headed up north. 

Sunday afternoon-Monday morning, I think we were on the field with the ball about 10 times and Olivia couldn't get enough. She was in heaven and so happy to be back to camp life. I know they will be happy back to freedom with the wind in their hair and hours in the sun and romping through the woods. But I miss them already. 

My biggest fear is that something will happen to me and they will think they've been abandoned and not understand why I am not there to take care of them. The thought of them feeling sad, lonely and confused makes me want to burst into tears again (seriously, how to real parents function on a daily basis?!). My second biggest fear is that something will happen to one of them and I will never see them again. 

I have to stay focused on my fun trip ahead, otherwise I start panicking and googling how to cancel my tickets and hotel room. They will be fine without me for a few days. 
And hopefully my dad will be fine too. I called around dinnertime tonight and all he said was, "they don't listen very well when they don't want to, do they?" 

I'm sure it will be a wonderful week for all of us. I hope so anyway... 

1 comment:

  1. Enjoy your time in the big apple! We are going in on Thursday to see Andrea Bocelli in Central Park. Can't wait!
    Now I know how you feel about leaving your bullies. Actually I think its worse than leaving kids behind. At least with kids (provided they are at a certain age) you can explain where you are going and that you will be back for them. Your doggies don't know this and its worrisome to think they are wondering what happened to you. When you get home it will be all over in their minds as soon as you walk through the door. Try not to stress it too much! Have fun!