Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Packing With Bulldogs- play by play

Scene- me with a heavy (overfilled) box precariously balanced in my arms.

step, step, *crash* step, step, *crash* "Olivia!" 

This dog won't let me out of her sight and is following me closely wherever I walk but she's not actually paying attention to where I am because every time I stop, she crashes into the back of my legs. Although it might also be that she wants me to know that she is there (annoying either way).

Once she gets yelled at to go lay down, a few minutes later I hear, 

*thunk* "woof" which is the sound of Olivia jumping on Griffin and knocking him to the ground while she humps him in the head out of boredom. 

"Olivia!" 

As I get near the gate with the heavy box still in my arms, the sound of the running of the bulls thuds through the backyard, followed by *crash* *crunch* *slam* as we all fight to be the first one out of the gate, them pushing and shoving as if they are going to miss their ride. Olivia barks and jumps (forgetting she is a bulldog!) and Grif looks excited, confused, a little nervous and desperate not to miss out on anything. 

I get the box in the car and usher two bulldogs back inside the fence, telling Olivia to go lay down and relax. 

*Glare* as in actual side eye from said bulldog (if looks could kill). I swear I saw her lift her little paw and give me a puppy middle finger.

5 minutes later, I'm carrying the next overfilled heavy box...

step, step, *crash* step, step, *crash* "Olivia!" 
*thunk* "woof" 
"Olivia!"

So we're on warning number 5. I'd like to think if she was a real child I would have followed through with my threats, but she's a dog, so we are just on repeat. 

Right now we're taking a break and I am gulping down wine, which is clearly going to make the moving boxes thing go way better as the night goes on. Olivia isn't thrilled with the sitting or the wine, and maybe I've already had too much to drink, but I swear she just lifted up her wrist as if to look at her watch and gave me a dirty look about the speed at which I am moving. 

She's might lose her mind when I leave her at home to go to my office in the morning. I'm hoping to sneak out really early before she notices. 

Less than 24 hours to camp... 

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